Monday, December 1, 2008

O.K.? Thanks.

My workday-the entire 16-hour ordeal of it-was a study in the truly ridiculous. Mediocre hair and makeup, explicit instructions as to the position of ever hand, foot, limb, etc., and, without fail, the subsequent dissatisfaction of the party who had issued aforementioned instructions, along with the tragic misuse of what was undoubtedly an exorbitantly expensive studio, left me with only one choice if I was to avoid a bonafide fit: I just had to laugh. To this, the 'stylist' in the process of repositioning my arm 3mm to the left responded by asking; "what's funny?" Ummm..this is ridiculous? A plastic mannequin would be better suited to performing this task? This entire setup is remarkably inefficient? No, I couldn't think of anything to say to her. For I was fairly certain that I found myself the sole party present whose intellect was entirely focussed upon the UTTER RIDICULOUSNESS of the situation.

A dozen dense dufuses all in a row..when faced with such an assortment of japanese-catalogue-photoshoot crewmembers, amongst which at least one suit-clad headboss male is always sure to be found, one's only law-abiding resort can be laughter. My laughter in Guangzhou was consistently met with more smiles and more laughter. My laughter in Tokyo today was met with concern (I have surmised that un-provoked laughter must be considered rude). It shouldn't have surprised me, after the makeup artist sumimasen(excuse me)-ed herself for letting out what was apparently an offensively obvious sigh of exhaustion heading into hour 13. Oh, the intrigues of a city in which an accidental bump on the street or in the metro is superseded by a curteous, apologetic bow, rather than quick (guilty) glance away and step in the opposite direction.

Consider this post my second foray into investigation of Japan's alarmingly high suicide rate; what people seem to be lacking is a 'healthy'-by which I mean, mentally healthy-sense of humor. A grasp of sarcasm-the lowest form a wit, but a form of wit nonetheless-would also prove beneficial, I'm sure. However, as much sarcasm involves saying things one may think freely but only express verbally under the guise of humor, I'm guessing that might be too much to ask. I wonder if they have the expression 'speak your mind' in japanese? Well, at least they have fleecy rubber ducky printed bathrobes:BONUS CONVERSATION SNIPPET: Makeup/Hair Lady (pushing hairpin into my scalp): Does it hurt?...Yours truly: Well, it's poking right into my head...M/H Lady: O.K.? Thanks.

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